Blog 5

Prompt 1B “A New Vision of Masculinity”

This article started out reinforcing a lot of ideas I have already known. All these ideas I still agree with. It is always still so upsetting to hear what you already know. That being called a “fag” is so horrible to men. It makes me upset that we use the term in that way, and it is degrading to the one being bullied and to LGBTQ members that a term used to associate with them sometimes is the “worst” thing you can call a man. It is nice to learn just how much men are pressured though. It works for both genders; we are all structured in a mold.

I like how the article said all the things boy DO NOT learn. They say they don’t learn much about being supportive, nurturing, showing emotion (besides anger) etc. This appealed to me because of the way it was written. We always say boys are naturally more aggressive, competitive, strong, etc but in reality that is not “natural” it is what they were taught and what they were molded into. Same goes for women. We always try to say that’s just the way things are, but in reality we made things this way. Society is making men the way they are. We are not born into stereotypes, we are brought up surrounded by those ideas and gender roles, and then we get molded into those. Boys are being robbed of showing their true self and it is also leading to aggression and violence. It was great to read that these issues are being looked at and that the new generation is being taught new qualities and not just the old fashion Marlboro man image.



Prompt 1A The Macho Paradox Chapter 13

It is nice to read of what men are doing to help stop violence and rape against women. It was a new concept for me to read all this, because for some reason you rarely hear about organizations of men taking a stand. I just recently started seeing flyers around campus of “Men can stop rape.” Before these flyers I literally never heard of men taking the movement to stop the violence that is mainly committed by men.

I loved the quote at the very beginning of the chapter. It stated “From today those who inflict violence on others will know they are being isolated and cannot count on other men to protect them” (p. 253). This was an epiphany to me. It showed me that maybe the problem all along was that men felt too comfortable and it almost feels natural and what they are taught. Men are taught to be aggressive, dominating, strong, etc. But once men take a stand, it is clear that men do not agree with this violence put onto women. Men fighting for women’s rights sadly gets more attention than when women fight for their rights. Although that seems degrading to women, it is comforting to hear of just how many men are starting to fight against this and it is nice to hear all the chances men can take and join to stop the violence and rape.



Prompt 2B The Macho Paradox Chapter 13

This chapter showed just how much men can do to stop violence against women. But it also showed how some men reply to being asked to take a stand. Most men think I would never rape or abuse someone, so why is it my problem? This shows how a male columnist responded when asked to answer and ask questions of what he and possibly other men are willing to do to stop rape and sexual assault. He responded “I will not rape anyone. Is there anything more I should add to this?” (p. 260). This quote shows how most men think about the issue of rape and sexual assault.

I have many male friends that think like this. They get irritated with my newly found feminist outlooks, and are constantly saying things similar to the above quote. Most men do not see it as their issue because they themselves are not personally causing it. However it is seen that when men speak out there is more attention towards the issue. I think the problem is most men are not educated on this. I myself was not educated until recently about how much of an effect men can have and how many organizations there are out there. I recently broke through to one of my friends to research this and convinced him to do a speech for GEO on sexual assault and rape and how to stop it. It is encouraging to hear, and he informed me that his professor and most females in the class thought the idea was great. So it is helping him out too. Men just need to be more educated on the topic, and hopefully there can be more awareness and actions taken to stop sexual assault and rape.


Prompt 1A The Will to Change Chapter 7

Hooks presented a new idea to me in this chapter and it was something I now agree with. Hooks presented the idea of how by fighting for women’s equalities we often ignore some of men’s needs. At first while reading this, I didn’t want to listen. It sounded like Hooks was down talking feminism and patting men on the back. But after reading the entire chapter I understand and agree. Feminism is about equality, so if we are going to fight for it, we need to fight for everyone. One shouldn’t fight for equal pay and then get in power and forget about everyone else. They should fight for the poor masses. We are never taught equalities or that we can choose what we want to do, we are always taught distinct gender differences or limitations rather.

We always say that women don’t get this or that. So we try to make sure that women get equal rights to men. But as Hooks describes, boys are never given “the right to choose not to engage in aggressive or violent play, the right to play with dolls, or play dress up, to wear costumes of either gender, the right to choose” (p. 111). I never looked at it this way, but I totally agree! I am not saying men are so denied of things, or that women are in the wrong. But in reality feminism is about equality for all. And all along we have been robbing boys of being able to choose just as we have for women. There must be attention to both faults, and we should be teaching the youth freedom to express themselves, and less on gender roles and how to fit into their box based on their gender.



Prompt 1C The Will to Change Chapter 11

I found chapter 11 very confusing. It wasn’t clear to me exactly what Hooks was trying to say. What I did get out of it, was that she was saying that men right now are incapable to love. I found this confusing and did not agree. She speaks as if no man can love, but that there are “beacons of hope embodying the truth that men can love” (p. 172). Her statements contradict what I have seen. Sure men love in a different way, and some may not love, but I know men are capable of love. Hooks makes this idea seem so farfetched. I grew up with a loving father, uncles, grandpas, and male friends.

I also can never get around how Hooks will sometimes generalize too much. She talks of how gay men are able to love and that they are seen as feminine because they show feeling, and then she goes onto state that “straight men and patriarchal gay men can learn from them” (p. 175). This statement was too generic for me. To me this statement is saying no straight man knows how to love or show emotion and that almost every gay guy does. Sure some gay men may be more open to things like this, but it doesn’t mean that all are, and it doesn’t mean that straight men are incapable of showing emotion. I guess Hooks just challenges the lifestyle I grew up in. Just call me lucky I guess, but this chapter was confusing and un-relatable to me.